How can I get over unrequired love?

Unrequired love is one of the most difficult issues to overcome in a relationship, whether friend, family, or spouse. When the love of one person is not reciprocated by the other, hurt feelings, loneliness, and even existential angst are likely to ensue. Here are some common situations that are often fraught with unrequired love:

Polka: You don't have to like polka, but I'm so sorry, "The Chicken Dance" is required for lawful marriages in the United States.

Skijoring: You don't have to like skijoring, but when you see a monstrous sedan zooming down a busy road in Portland, OR, during an ice storm, pulling a skier who's expertly dodging all the other cars, parked and moving—you may change your mind.

The Marvel Cinematic Universe: Personally, I'm a Marvel fan. But with 27 films and 12 more in the works, not to mention an expanding multiverse, it may be time to step away from rabid fandom and consider it research for your clinical psychology paper on how people today are losing touch with reality.

Dark chocolate infused with chilis: Why are they putting chilis in everything lately? You are not required to love them. You can stick with your kosher caramel, sea-salt, dandelion truffles.

Danish modern furniture: Danish modern, with its sleek lines and thin legs that look like they're going to break without warning, is an acquired taste. If your roommate doesn't like Danish modern furniture, just tell her how much it cost and call it a NFT.

Arbor Day: No, you don't have to love Arbor Day. I'm as much a tree hugger as anyone, but it's like, Here! Have this holiday that makes you feel guilty about trees but you don't get the time off to do anything about it! Feel free to love the trees, not the day.

Wisconsin: Honestly, I don't know anything about Wisconsin. I imagine it's cold a lot of the time and filled with mosquitoes the rest. And Laverne and Shirley lived there. If your loved one loves Wisconsin and you don't, maybe compromise and visit Minnesota.

Cephalopods: This is a tougher one. Frankly, I don't know why someone wouldn't love cephalopods. Octopuses have one brain—for each leg! They can use tools! They can recognize people! They can open screw-lid jars! Even so, it's good to be kind. If your sister doesn't love cephalopods, forget the traditional Christmas Octopus this year and buy her an aardvark.

Twitter: Do you have to love Twitter? It's better if you don't. But it is a handy place to record all your Wordle scores.

We must come to accept that we cannot require another to love the same things we do, and that's okay. Most of the time, we can have a strong relationship with someone without loving the same things.

Unless, of course, you love someone and they don't love you. Alas, few things are more painful than unrequited love.

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