Do Christians have the authority to rebuke Stan?

Absolutely, because Stan is a huge jerk. I don't know what part of "stop eating my lunch out of the office fridge" he doesn't get, but it's getting old. Plus, he wears socks with sandals. And he thinks we can't hear him humming to Miley Cyrus songs on the other side of the cubicle. We can, Stan, so shut up already!

As a Christian, it's a relief to know we can rebuke Stan. Atheists and Hare Krishnas can even do it—are you listening, Dave and Ramesh? There are some beings we're not given such authority over—for instance, the Bible never tells us to rebuke Satan.

Stan, on the other hand, needs a good verbal kick in the pants.

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